Reading my devotions for the day, I’m often moved to respond in writing.  Today Psalm 88 did it.  It’s not a “Gee whiz, everything is wonderful!” prayer.  Quite the opposite.  “Heman the Ezrahite”, the identified composer, was darkly despondent.  I’ll quote only a portion of his 18 verses.  Read slowly.  Keep in mind Heman is praying this to God . . .

O LORD, God of my salvation;
I cry out day and night before you.

Let my prayer come before you;
incline your ear to my cry!

For my soul is full of troubles,
and my life draws near to Sheol (the place of the dead) . . .

You have put me in the depths of the pit,
in the regions dark and deep.

Your wrath lies heavy upon me,
and you overwhelm me with all your waves . . .

I am shut in so that I cannot escape;
my eye grows dim through sorrow . . .

But I, O LORD, cry to you;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.

O LORD, why do you cast my soul away?
Why do you hide your face from me? . . .

I suffer your terrors; I am helpless . . .

They surround me like a flood all day long;
they close in on me together.

You have caused my beloved and my friend to shun me;
my companions have become darkness.

That’s the way the prayer ends.  No climaxing chorus of victory.  Not a note of hope.  Just lonely darkness.  Where’s this guy’s faith?  Why doesn’t he remember the Lord’s glorious works of old?  Why doesn’t he quote some good promise of the Lord for tomorrow?  Because this is how he honestly feels.

Hasn’t there been a time or two (or more) when we’ve felt like this?  A soul full of troubles? Tired of living?  Trapped in a deep, dark pit with no escape?  Drowning?  Cast off from God?  Terrorized and helpless?  Alone and assaulted?  As if God is angry and hiding?

Apparently it’s acceptable to tell God things like this.  To be brutally honest about how we’re feeling.  If this prayer is any indication, God won’t strike us dead or condemn us for questioning him and, yes, even painfully complaining to him.

Nobody wants to stay like this.  We’d rather pray Asaph’s prayer in Psalm 79.  He begins reciting how the nations have devastated Jerusalem, how they’ve “poured out [the] blood [of the Lord’s people] like water.”  He asks, “How long, O LORD?  Will you be angry forever?” (79:5).  He prays for God’s help (79:9), then makes this confident  affirmation at the end:  “But we your people, the sheep of your pasture, will give thanks to you forever; from generation to generation we will recount your praise” (79:13).  He’s full of faith that the Lord will defeat his enemies.  Heman, however,  is in no mood to consider coming victory.  The Lord has “assaulted” him (88:16).  He’s ready to die (88:15).

There are actually Christians who claim if we speak this way we create the condition.  Don’t say God has put you in a dark pit or else he will!  That’s heretical nonsense.  Of course, we can drive ourselves into deeper despondency if Psalm 79 is always our model prayer.  It’s good for us when we feel unloved to pray, “I will sing of the steadfast love of the LORD, forever” (Psalm 89:1a).

But there are times (ask Heman) when we’re so despondent that honesty requires a kind of “raw-ness” to our prayers.  No need to pretend.  No need to sing “faith is the victory” when we feel like “why do you hide your face from me?”  The Lord understands.  He prefers raw honesty to hypocritical religiosity.

So “pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us” (Psalm 62:8).
” . . . weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning” (Psalm 30:5b).  And we will sing . . .

You turned my wailing into dancing;
you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy;

that my heart may sing to you and not be silent.
O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever (Psalm 30:11,12).

(Note:  If you’re reading this on Saturday, tomorrow is Sunday.  Gather with God’s worshiping people and get lifted up!)